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famous quotes





Foxworthy, Jeff

US comedian.

Quotes

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.
- Jeff Foxworthy

The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.
- Jeff Foxworthy

If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
- Jeff Foxworthy

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?
- Jeff Foxworthy

Whatever cleanin' goes on on the planet, women do 99% of it. But see, women are not as proud of their 99% as men are of our one! We clean sumpin' up we're gonna talk about it all year long...'Look don't worry about emptyin' that ashtray, I done got it alright? Did it for you, Sweet Pea.'
- Jeff Foxworthy

You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!
- Jeff Foxworthy

If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.
- Jeff Foxworthy

 


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Zola, Emile



 




 

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